How many are too many?

Daydreamer

My neighbor has two children. They are incredibly well behaved but she never let's them have a moment's rest. What would normally be used as free time is jam packed with after school activities and they are on the run all weekend.

It almost seems as if she is afraid they might develop independent thought.

How many activities are too many?

alaine

It sounds like a lot to me. I would have gone crazy as a kid. Of course, I'm the artistic type, and I need time to get lost in my head. If I didn't have that time as a child I would've never developed the fiction skills I have now. Sometimes parents have a funny notion of what success is in their heads.

unique1

Well, if they don't have any room for their own thoughts, then clearly what they have is too much! Having after school activities and working with the family is one thing but what you're saying might be a little over the top.

katharina

I think the "too many activities" line is crossed when a kid is so involved in schedules that they can no longer be a kid.

Often in cases like that it is the parent overcompensating for something or another (childhood they didnt' have, thinking they need to be like that to be a good parent, etc.) and unfortunately in those cases it's often not the child's choice at all.

Taggart

I think from the way you describe their situation, they may be into too many things.

I suspect the kids would be better served getting into fewer activities, but finding things that they're really drawn to and spending more time on those, and then having free time as well.

woodpecker

Oh dear, this is absolutely too much. She is simply adding a lot of stress into the kids' lives. Life is stressful enough as adults. But should kids share adult stress? They should be permitted to enjoy life as much as possible. A balance must be struck between work and play.

melodious

That does sound like too much -- but the flip side is that parents worry that if children have too much free time or getting bored they might end up going down the wrong path in life (making bad choices).

Kitten

That could certainly be too much, but is it stuff the kids *want* to do? Maybe on the weekends they're doing things they really enjoy or maybe the kids love those school activities because they're doing them with friends, etc.

Daydreamer

I would be more worried that their inability to string three of their own thoughts together would leave them open for some bad choices!

loyalknight10

I think that is not a good approach to develop kids potential. Kids must be allowed to think independently and that is when they could realize their full potential. The more parents like to control their children thoughts, the more they will lose control of their children.

baguiopine

I'm a mom myself but though my daughter is not yet going to school, I read a lot about smart parenting and I guess children also need a time for themselves to relax because being fed too much with school activities is not good for the brain. A child's brain has only a maximum capacity of hours to absorb learning just like us adults. Sometimes, it needs to rest to restore strength for the next activities.

heretoday

I would also factor in the resentment a poor kid would feel being marched from pillar to post, unable to enjoy alot of things their friends do. Anger usually results in bad choices.

Frankie

Actually one of the problems here is that children need to be taught how to make choices. Having them involved in everything so they never miss out means that they will never learn to set priorities.

They are also missing out on a childhood.....which should be a priority for their parents.

katharina

It should certainly be a priority, yes. I've seen parents complaining about how busy they are and then they say that it's because of all the lessons from everything from dance to art to crafts to music. "Something every single night after school and sometimes twice a night. I'm exhausted!"

Well like helloooooooooooooo! Don't sign them up for so much!